One component of my work this summer is teaching yoga classes for both the children in the shelters and for the young women who were rescued from the red light district at a young age. This evening I had the opportunity to teach a yoga and meditation class for the young women at Sonar Tori.
Some of the young women I had the privilege of teaching the class for were trafficked at a young age, forced to work as sex workers before being rescued by New Light.
The women at Sonar Tori have now been removed from the red light district for years. But whether you simply grew up in that environment or were forced to work as a sex worker at a young age, it leaves a mark. Even years following abuse and trauma women still struggle with what they’ve been though. They may still struggle with feeling safe in their own bodies and with others, with flashbacks, depression, PTSD, with insomnia… There’s no straight uphill trajectory when it comes to the healing process. There may be a period of peace before something triggers a recurrence of PTSD or a flashback.
The first stage of trauma recovery is safety-within your own body and with others. As the healing process progresses, this stays a vital component of recovery. Yoga can do a beautiful job of facilitating this awareness and safety within your own body.
I spoke with Urmi Ray, one of the directors of New Light, before coming back to Sonar Tori tonight. None of the young women are currently experiencing PTSD. However, knowing their backgrounds and what they’ve experienced, I understand these women still struggle at times with recurring symptoms.
With their background, I wanted to be very mindful of how I taught the class. And I wanted to teach the class in the same manner I would if all the students were still experiencing PTSD, because the trauma these girls have survived, lives just below the surface sometimes.
Before I started teaching we all just sat on the floor, talking, getting comfortable with each other. I wanted to share what an honor it is to be able to teach a yoga class for them. And I wanted to make sure I knew all the young women’s names, got a feel for their personalities again and gave the girls a chance to re familiarize themselves with who I am. I always want to generate a safe space for these young women. A component of that is knowing who’s teaching the class and gaining a better understanding of their intentions.
When I’m teaching a class, especially a class with survivors of trauma, I’m always mindful of my students, of their postures, their breathing, their expressions, their body language… And I want to encourage them to be mindful of their own inner and outer experiences and to please, please observe them without judgment.
I wanted these girls to feel comfortable being themselves, trying new postures and laughing as we may fall out of them together. I believe every yoga class needs some laughter and this class was no different. And there was plenty of it tonight, which I loved seeing, hearing and being a part of:)
During the course of the practice, most yoga students naturally come to know their most comfortable poses, which they can use as a resting pose throughout the practice. Trauma survivors can be incredibly disconnected from their bodies and sensations. I wanted to make a point of teaching some common resting poses and gently remind them they’re welcome to move into these poses at any time during class.
And in this class I wanted to encourage the girls to respect their bodies, to listen to them and welcome them to modify any posture if need be, to stay in a particular posture or to simply let the posture go. But inviting students to simply follow their own flow increases the risk of losing patients who are prone to dissociation. Keeping this in mind I offered options while maintaining the structure and kept speaking calmly throughout the practice, kept my instructions more specific and repeated them often.
Yoga helps relieve stress and tension people may not have even realized they were holding onto in the first place. And when this tension comes to the surface I wanted to help the girls work through these moments by encouraging them to breathe, reorienting them and helping them become conscious of their surroundings again, using all their senses.
One young woman had a moment in the middle of the class when I noticed her body stiffen and her breathing become shallow, I could see her dissociating from her body, from her environment. I appreciated that the class was smaller, which allowed me to give each girl more individual attention and allowed me to help her into a resting pose that felt safe for her-pose of the child.
I spoke with her gently, simply had her allow her body to shake and reminded her to breathe, reminded her she was not alone. I kept speaking calmly, giving her something to ground her, to remind her she was safe as she allowed her body to experience what it needed to. With trauma, our immediate reaction may be fight, flight or it may also be to freeze. Which means in recovery, we need to allow our bodies to experience what many times they weren’t able to at the time of the initial trauma.
We used all of our senses, the feel of the hard ground underneath us, the feel of my hand on hers, the smell of spices coming from the kitchen, the sight of her close friend in front of her… and gradually her breathing became calmer, her body slowly relaxed and she became reoriented and was able to rejoin the flow of the class.
To be vulnerable in that way takes real courage.
We transitioned into meditation at the end of class, giving the girls time to let go of any worries about the past, any stress about the future and to simply experience the present moment and the sensation of their breath entering and leaving their body. Traumatized individuals tend to have difficulty tolerating unstructured meditation so I wanted to keep speaking throughout the meditation, guiding them through the breathes, helping them release any tension their jaw, their neck, their back, their hands may be holding onto. Guiding them through the last three breath cycles before having them open their eyes and ending with Namaste.
And when I say Namaste I return to its purpose, its core intention. I bow to you. I bring my palms together, my hands to my heart chakra, the wellspring of compassion in all of us, and I honor that place. That place we all share and that has such great capacity for good, for selflessness, for simple, true kindness.
Afterwards we all sat in a circle. I wanted to first thank all of them for a wonderful class. And to acknowledge we are all doing the practice together and I am simply leading them through a practice that they are in control of, have a say in how it’s run and which is making them into stronger women.
And I wanted to give all the girls a chance to speak. Share in what way they felt more relaxed, what they were able to work through or what they would like changed, done differently, incorporated or taken out. I wanted them to feel comfortable being honest with me, and they were. They shared they felt sleepy and loved it. They wanted a longer meditation at the end, to spend longer focusing on their breath at the beginning and felt much less stressed, felt their necks and shoulders untangle a little. I was just able to talk with them, about the practice and about everything, about their day, about where they would love to travel, about growing up in Kolkata… It’s always a genuine pleasure just to spend time with these women.
And I was able to speak with the young woman after class, share with her it takes courage to be that vulnerable and to please know I’m here to listen and know the girls at Sonar Tori are as well - she is not alone.
Teaching these young women is an honor. It’s very different from when I do my own practice in the morning and my awareness is sole on my body, my mind, my breathing….
But still, teaching a class like this, getting to be with these women, it’s healing for me as well. Yoga really does, it teaches us to cure what need not be endured and endure what cannot be cured.